Non-Court Dispute Resolution
How do you resolve your financial family dispute?
Relationship breakdown can be emotionally charged, and those emotions can affect how easily financial issues are resolved. The good news is that most of these disputes can be, and typically are, resolved without going to court.
Going to court should be a last resort, like pulling the ejector cord when all efforts to land the plane in an orderly fashion have failed. Even when you’re already in the court system, the focus should be on steering your case away from the court path, and towards resolution, wherever possible (and safe). Failing to try to sort things out without court input can result in financial consequences in the form of costs orders when a judge makes you pay a contribution toward the other person’s legal fees. Negotiation and non-court dispute resolution are not just healthy options, they are strongly encouraged by the court rules and failure to engage can result in costs penalties or court-imposed delay.
What are the options? Which ones will work for your situation? Why bother if the other side of your dispute is putting roadblocks in the way of resolution?
Below are some options, in order of increasing potential expense (based on typical examples but this is a matter of opinion and is case-specific). Not all of these options are within formal definitions of non-court dispute resolution but we deliberately include a wide range. There are other options not covered in detail below including joint non-lawyer services like Amicable.
Courtney does not recommend any particular service, process or professional. Every case is different.
Your Dispute Resolution Options
It is possible to try one option and then move onto another if the first option is not working well. Mediation, for example, is often undertaken in parallel with other approaches. In our podcast with Tristan Harvey (featured below), he explains how he paused a mediation to get an indication from another lawyer on a tricky issue that had prevented the couple reaching a deal. The point is, you can be creative. Think about what would work best for your family. And know that, with most non-court options, you can get off the treadmill, and try other options, if both sides agree.
It is easier said than done to focus on resolution rather than the inevitable emotions. Anyone can get bogged down in the history that has led to this point, especially if an ex’s old ways continue to grate. But the professionals – the lawyers, the mediators, the judges – almost always put that stuff to one side when they focus on sorting finances on relationship breakdown. It’s sensible – and more helpful - to try to follow their lead.
It helps to get clear advice early on about the range of possible outcomes in your case. Next, work through the detail of any proposals you receive from your ex. Are there elements you can accept or tweak? Is there agreement over the 'structure' (who keeps what) of the outcome if not 'the numbers'? For example, can you agree which assets need to be sold and which assets either side should retain? Ask yourself positive versions of the questions that spring up - like 'how would this proposal work in practice?' - rather than put up your own roadblocks to compromise. It takes two. It takes work. But it's worth it.
This video visualises solving a dispute using the metaphor of a wall. See what you think.